SHAUN: Your feet are disgusting, Meredith.
MEREDITH: I know. I need a pedicure. I haven’t had one yet because it’s been winter, and I am barely shaving my legs at this point in the year.
SHAUN: No. For real. Yuck. Why do you pick at your feet? Stop it. Stop cutting your feet. It is so weird. Like, “I’m a cutter,” weird.
MEREDITH: I know. Stop it! When I am stressed out, I like to pick at my feet.
SHAUN: That’s weird.
MEREDITH: Shaun! That’s enough! I am stressed out, and this is my thing. Tell me ten good things about my appearance right now!
SHAUN: Fine. Okay, so ten good things. You have a great rack. You have nice lips… in both places. I love your ass, and I love it even more when you don’t have a pair of Spanx on. Uh…. Your eyes! You have super pretty eyes. You look good in a dress… like, I love it when you wear a dress with cowboy boots. I like the way you laugh, it’s hot. You have good teeth. And even though you hate them, I like your knees.
MEREDITH: That’s only, like, eight things, Shaun. I asked for ten.
SHAUN: Sorry. I got distracted by your feet again. You have really gross feet.
And then I chopped his wiener off.
Now quickly tell me something weird you do when you’re under a lot of stress, so I don’t feel weird about cutting the dead skin off my feet with a steak knife. And go…